I've been having trouble sleeping at night, keep thinking of nonsense even when I dream I also think about it.
Anyway the story goes something like this:
I was advised to change my mindset. I must start loving myself and stop reproaching myself for not being able to do this or that.
Don't keep thinking that when I meet a small tiny weeny setback and I want to run away and hide, thinking "why things aren't going my way" and start to be lazy.
I must be content with what I have. My thinking has become unbalanced. And have to stop the "everyone owes me something" attitude.
And (surprise!!!) I have to stop thinking that I'm useless. I actually have a use just that now I don't know myself.
[Actually I didn't tell anyone I keep feel inferior and useless, unable to accomplish anything. How did this get leaked out? Haha.]
And actually I have 人缘的 just that I am forever not contented and keep thinking negatively and make my life difficult for myself. Therefore I forced myself into becoming a loner.
And once I know how to be contented and become happy with what I have, there is actually no need to worry about me being left on the shelf. There would be like 2 or 3 suitors waiting for me.
Hahahaha! I don't know to believe it or not -- Not the suitors part but the mindset part.
Yes I have to admit that I'm not contented with what I have. I keep on comparing. Stuff like "why other people have but we don't have?" so I guess my thinking really has become unbalanced. How to change my mindset?!!
But the love myself bit. I don't know. I don't know if I'm actually angry with myself subconsciously.
Conclusion: so I should think about the positive side and stop being discontented?